Saying no can touch old fears.
It may bring guilt, anxiety, tension, shame, fear of rejection, or the sense that you are letting someone down.
For many people, yes became a way to stay safe, liked, needed, included or close. The body may have learned to agree before there is time to feel.
Boundaries are relational. They live in the space between self and other, closeness and distance, care and honesty.
Therapy can help you notice where your yes comes from, where your no lives in the body, and what support you need to stay connected to yourself.
Learning to say no can also mean learning to feel your own shape again.
You may gently notice:
- Where do I feel yes in my body?
- Where do I feel no?
- What fear appears when I imagine setting a boundary?
- What helps me stay connected to myself?
Written by
Eman Ellul